I want to go home – What to say to someone with dementia in care

6 September, 2023

The words “I want to go home” from a loved one with dementia can be both puzzling and poignant. But what does this phrase truly signify? And how can caregivers and family members best support their loved ones when they hear it? This article offers quick tips and insights to help you navigate these emotional moments with empathy and useful tools such as CareFinder

Understanding Dementia 

  • The Brain and Memory Loss: Dementia affects more than memory. It can alter perceptions, making familiar places feel strange. 
  • Emotional Responses in Dementia Patients: Beyond cognitive challenges, dementia can stir intense emotions, often expressed through phrases like wanting to go home. 

Decoding the Phrase “I Want to Go Home” 

  • Emotional Needs: This plea often goes beyond its literal meaning, reflecting a desire for comfort, safety, and belonging. 
  • Seeking Comfort and Familiarity: It might be a yearning for a time of clarity, understanding, and love. 
  • Expressing Discomfort: Sometimes, it’s a signal of immediate discomfort. Always ensure their basic needs are addressed. 

Effective Communication Strategies 

  • Active Listening: Show genuine interest in their feelings. 
  • Validating Feelings: Acknowledge their emotions. A response like, “I see how you feel. Let’s discuss it,” can be comforting. 
  • Distraction and Redirection: If they fixate on the idea of home, introduce a different activity or topic. 

Creating a Comfortable Environment 

  • Personalizing the Living Space: Familiar objects can create a sense of home. 
  • Familiar Routines and Activities: Regular routines and beloved activities can be reassuring. 

Addressing Emotional Needs 

  • Importance of Physical Touch: A simple touch or hug speaks volumes. 
  • Music and Memory: Familiar tunes can bring joy and connection. 

Handling Difficult Moments 

  • Staying Calm and Patient: Their actions aren’t intentional but a way of expressing themselves. 
  • Seeking Professional Guidance: When in doubt, consult dementia care experts. 

Care Options 

Here at CareFinder, we’re here to aid you in the search for the perfect care home. Ensuring your future home has all the requirements and skills required to give your family member a forever loving home. 

FAQs 

  • Why the frequent desire to go home? 
    It’s a blend of emotional needs, a quest for familiarity, and sometimes, a signal of discomfort. 
  • How should I react? 
    Listen, validate, and discern the underlying emotion. 
  • Should I correct their perception of home? 
    Avoid confrontations. Gently redirect the conversation or engage them in a calming activity. 
  • Can familiarity help? 
    Yes! Familiar items and routines evoke a sense of belonging. 
  • How does music benefit them? 
    Music can trigger cherished memories, offering solace and connection. 
  • Is repetitiveness a common trait? 
    Yes, due to cognitive challenges, repetitive behaviors are typical.